Lecture on the Illithid

Professor Bleak is at it again, this time on one of the great scourges of the Planes, and also one of its greater trading empires.

"The Illithid are scary people. Some might argue that they aren't even people at all. Lets face it: if your primary sustenance is the mental energy of intelligent creatures, you just might not be a person.

"That said, you might have to deal with them at some point in a way that doesn't end with you munching calamari.

"First off, what are the Illithid? They're usually between six and seven feet tall, bipedal, with bilateral symmetry. Two arms, purplish or pinkish coloring, though other skin tones occur, and somewhere between two and twelve tentacles sticking out of the bottoms of their faces, where everyone else has a nose and mouth. They have natural psionic abilities. They can read your mind a bit unless you've warded it, and they can send thoughts to you no matter what. They can also peal the skin off your face with their brains.

"Yes, question? You in the back? Why, if they're so powerful, aren't they in charge somewhere? Well, first off, they are in some places. Second, they were, for a very long time. And third, cause everyone pretty much hates them.

"They eat brains, and minds. They aren't called mind flayers just cause it sounds snappy. Really, if they get you helpless, they can eat bits of your mind. That's their main food. Occasionally they actually need protein, and then they eat something's brain. Usually something intelligent. Their slaves, and they keep lots of them whenever they can, are never in good shape, and never secure in their lives. None of this leads to them playing nice with anyone else.

"But, yeah, they're powerful. They rule some entire worlds, and chunks of others. They've got a few strongholds out in the Astral Plane, although those ones mostly just hang out and beat off attacks from Gith. Everyone hates the illithid, but the gith have made a religion out of it.

"Good reason, too. The illithid used to have an empire that pretty much spanned everywhere. All the Planes, most of the Prime Material worlds, everything under the boot heel of the illithid. The gith were their slaves. It took a long time, but the illithid empire fell, and the gith have been trying to exterminate them ever since. Of course, the illithid still love gith slaves, when they can get their tentacles on them. See, the gith were bred to be the perfect illithid food.

"Question? Bred from what? Okay. Bred from humans. Humans are, probably, best as we can tell, the base stock for most everything. Some things evolved naturally, like orcs and elves, and somethings took some outside intervention, like lizard men, and somethings are the result of selective breeding, like gith, but one way or another, it's all about the humans. Illithid seem to be the only other independent intelligent race, and they eat your brains. Gods aren't really natural, so they don't count.

"Where was I?

"Hmm... Oh! Peeling the skin off your face. Right. The illithid are also capable of powerful magic, but think about the implications. Magic is fueled by a particular type of energy, and it's the same type that lets you think. Illithid eat that energy, which means they don't produce it naturally and can't draw it from other Planes, like we can. If they want to do magic, they have to have food near to hand. If you have to fight an illithid, you might be able to outlast him, if he isn't close enough to eat you. On the plus side, once the energy is formed into a magical effect, they can't eat it. So, they won't munch the fireball you throw at them.

"Of course, with all that slave labor, they've got lots of stuff to sell, and since they also eat the source of that labor, they buy a lot of things too. So killing them isn't always best."